Monthly Archives: January 1995

Chess Violence

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Danny decided to join the chess club at school. He liked the movie “In Search of Bobby Fisher.” He had me teach him how to play. On the first chess club meeting, the boys paired off and played each other.

First Danny played Shawn Kerner, another second-grader. Shawn got mad when Danny moved his King two squares and made his Castle hop over the King. “I’m castling,” Danny told Shawn. Shawn didn’t think there was such a thing. Danny proceeded to take all of Shawn’s men except for his King and then he won. Shawn hit Danny over his head with the chess board (Shawn’s) and it broke the board.

Then Danny played a fifth grader. They played three games and Danny won one of the games.

Nicole made all “A”s except for a “B” in P.E. because she could only do 9 gymnastic moves instead of 10 that it took to get an “A”. Danny made all “A”s.

Betty

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Kelly Story

Kathy went out to get the mail. When she came back, she found Kelly sitting on the sofa with the portable phone, chatting away. Kathy said “What are you doing?” Kathy noticed that the phone was on, so just to make sure, she put it to her ear and said, “Hello?”

The woman on the other end said, “Is Betty there?”

“You must have the wrong number,” said Kathy. The woman seemed confused as she hung up.

Kathy asked Kelly, “Did you answer the phone?”

“I was talking to Betty,” Kelly said proudly.

Her first unattended phone conversation. (That we know of.)

Dirt

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Kelly Story

Kelly came walking into the den and told Kathy, “Sumping’s in Charlie’s bed.”

“What is in Charlie’s bed?” asked Kathy.

“Iownknow,” she shrugged. “Sumping!”

Then Kelly walked out and came back in and shrugged, “It’s dirt.”

Kathy thought Kelly was just playing games so she brushed it off. Later, Kathy discovered that Charlie had thrown up in her bed.

Charlie is lucky that the whole thing tickled Kathy when she figured out that Kelly was trying to be a good little reporter with her limited vocabulary. Kathy called me at work to tell me the story.

P.S.

It seems Charlie found herself a nice ham bone with a bunch of ham on it in one of the neighbor’s trash bags. The feast cost her, though.