Jackie Chan – the Singer

Have you ever heard Jackie Chan sing? On the Mulan Special Edition, I was checking out the bonus features and Jackie Chan was singing a song in Chinese. It was a song from the movie, and I just thought it was funny to hear him sing. He sounded like one of the bad contestants from American Idol. I wish there was some way you could hear it. He had his own music video too with shots of him either standing there, or doing some pretty lame karate moves. That is pretty much it…

The Hideous Sisters

Who are these 2 hideous people? I think we can all see who is the better looking one, but I am just not going to say anything. Well, you can certainly tell those two are related by their extreme ugliness. Must run in the family…

KellyUgly Claire

Woah! Is that their dad? That might explain something…

Dad

Now playing: We Are The Family by Sister Sledge

Doctor Kelly-Children Won’t Clean Up Room

Doctor K,

How can I get my children to clean up their bedrooms?

–Exasperated Mom

DEAR EXASPERATED MOM,

ALTHOUGH SOMETHINGS ARE BEST LEFT UNSOLVED, I MUST ANSWER ALL PEOPLE’S QUESTIONS. I THINK A GOOD SOLUTION IS TO TAKE EVERYTHING ON YOUR KIDS FLOOR AND OUT OF PLACE AND PUT IT IN A BOX. TELL YOUR KID TO PUT THEM AWAY AND THAT NEXT TIME YOU WILL THROW EVERYTHING AWAY THAT IS NOT WHERE IT BELONGS IN THEIR ROOM. GOOD LUCK!!

~~DR KELLY

you got a problem? email me, dr. kelly at kelly@fiveforks.com and i guarantee that i will answer give a solution to your problem asap!

Dr. Kelly – Why Do Siblings Fight?

DR K,

Why do siblings fight? Don’t they love each other?

–Sad Dad

Dear Sad Dad,

Why do you think? You were once a child. Most fights are caused because a younger sibling annoys the older sibling and continues on and on and does not listen. Other times it is borrowing each other’s things without asking. It could simply be because they do not want to have the same opinion and want to be better than the other so the argue. I think the best solution is to take the younger sibling, put air holes in a box with some granola bars and capri suns, and then mail him/her to Japan!

Do you have a problem in your life? Email me, Dr. Kelly!

Diaries of a Genius #6

1/6/05

Dear Spud,

I have not been visiting you recently because I needed to spend some quality time with Yams. I am working on trying to make potatoes healthy. I want to make a potato that has 100% of the following: Vitamin A, Vitamin B, Vitamin C, Vitamin D, Vitamin E, Vitamin K, and Calcium. I have nearly achieved this by actually transferring these minerals into the potato’s DNA! It is very difficult, I must use a DNA transfer machine that I built. No time to talk about this, if you wanted to know about this kinda thing you wouldn’t be such a french fry and actually try to be friends with Yams. Okay, sorry, my imagination is getting to me. Ever since I saw Toy Story… Well now, things are going pretty good at school. I made Red stop sitting by me and let one of my REAL friends from popular sit by me. His name is Ricky, and is one of the more frequent users of the dialect popular. I have cracked a few more of the words:

Fo Shizzle: “Fo Shizzle my nizzle fa dizzle” it is sometimes used like this or other strange ways. Now, the first clue was that I thought “nizzle might be noggin. Since most of the strange words sound like the real words. “fa” must be a contraction for “for a”. So, when I saw “Fo shizzle my noggin for a dizzle”, I thought that dizzle could mean dollar. It all made perfect since. Most populars aren’t too smart. Fo shizzle :: For sale!!! “For sale, my noggin, for a dollar”

That took me a long time to figure out so I don’t have any more words to share with you. Well, I will NEVER say,”Fo Shizzle my nizzle fa dizzle”. That would be quite embarrassing. Sometimes I wonder if most the guys even know what they are saying… Well, it is way past my curfew. Boy, it is already 8:30. Goodnight!

Bradford

Clyde the Golden and Stout the Great

This is a test using a new program for blogging, Ecto. It is neat because you don’t have to type in those codes to make the font a different color for an example. I can make my font many different colors, and never have to type in one of those codes. I can also change my font whenever I want too! There are many different types to choose from. No codes to type then either!! So… other things I can do is import pictures with a click of a button, hardly taking any time at all!

Dcp 1050

Clyde, the golden retriever puppy.

This picture was imported from iphoto (our digital photo library). i went under draft, import picture from iphoto, and the whole library showed up!

Img 1100-2

Stout, the Guinness Sheltie.

That is all.

Now playing: 80’s Jungle by Trip

(Actually by Uno)